So I caught myself comparing my spiritual journey to someone else’s today...
For a while, I was doing good spiritually. Then all of a sudden I felt like I was doing bad again. It didn’t feel any different than the familiar spiritual battles that I was already used to facing. If you’ve ever experienced this, you’re not alone- and honestly, that’s normal. It’s normal for us as humans to fall under sin and then naturally desire the grace and forgiveness of God. In fact, if you do, then that means your soul is on the right path- the right path of recognizing your own faults, and one step closer to holiness!
Anyways, as I was on my way home from school, I read something that was very touching and it really made me think. It made me realize that I hadn’t been myself in awhile- my true authentic self- and that, I missed very much. I remembered how I used to be when I was younger: less worldly and closer to Christ. I then started to ponder the question of why is it so difficult to carry my own cross, when others make it seem so easy? Why am I not strong enough? Why is it so easy for others? All of these questions kept reminiscing inside my mind until I came to a legitimate answer- and that being, that it’s not.
We honestly don’t know what anyone else is going through spiritually, and even if we did, it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter because everyone’s relationship and journey with God is different, and that’s the beauty of it all. My spiritual journey is not the same as yours, nor does that make mine any more valuable- we’re all on different paths, and that’s the beauty to the authenticity of life.
After I contemplated most of this, I found my way into the small chapel at my church. It was then when I opened up the Word of God and landed on a random page. That random page happened to be exactly what I needed to read- and hopefully, if you’re going through something similar, it’s what you need to read too. The passage was:
1I love the Lord, who listened
to my voice in supplication,
2Who turned an ear to me
on the day I called.
3I was caught by the cords of death;
the snares of Sheol had seized me;
I felt agony and dread.
4Then I called on the name of the Lord,
“O Lord, save my life!”
5Gracious is the Lord and righteous;
yes, our God is merciful.
6The Lord protects the simple;
I was helpless, but he saved me.
7Return, my soul, to your rest;
the Lord has been very good to you.
8For my soul has been freed from death,
my eyes from tears, my feet from stumbling.
9I shall walk before the Lord
in the land of the living.
10I kept faith, even when I said,
“I am greatly afflicted!”
-Psalm 116:1-10, New American Bible Revised Edition.
The last verse especially grabbed my attention.
Rather than burying ourselves into a pit of shame, let us rejoice for God has called us to righteousness! For that we chose to answer His call, and hadn’t given up! The Bible itself reminds us that we are not weak, but rather strong for continuing to hold on to our faith- even if it was with the very last bit of us.
God is proud.
He never abandons a repentant heart.
In conclusion, your relationship with God is beautiful- regardless if it looks like someone else’s or not. God sees how much you struggle, and He’s proud of how far you’ve come. He’s proud and loves you for your resilient faith. Never doubt for a moment that He’s not.
As I came to an end with my time at the chapel, I heard God speak one last thing to me. As I was praying to Him, He reminded me that Mary is with me too and that she, along with all the saints and angels, are routing for me-
All of Heaven is routing for you.
Sisters in Christ, let us fall into a deeper love with our relationship with Christ, and let us rejoice! For you kept your faith, even when you were greatly afflicted!
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